Nemesis(es)

July 29th, 2010

Ben and I were in the line to play the roles of Shackleton or part of his merry band of intrepid polar explorers on a National Geographic documentary about his hidden stash of whiskey.

It was almost the perfect gig. Polar Explorers. International Documentary. Whiskey.

Sadly, there appear to be other bearded actors who will work for free… but on a weekday.

We have, in other words, the Anti-Ben and Anti-Dave.

They got the gig. The Bastards.

They may win this battle. But we will win the war. Oh yes. The battle has only just begun.

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I am a Cowboy

May 24th, 2010

Technically, I’m not a cowboy. I don’t ride a horse. I don’t go that close to cows. I’ve never called anyone a punk.

But I do have Red Dead Redemption which is officially awesome. And makes me a cowboy. It’s so immersive I’ve found myself walking from Point A to Gunfight B because I wanted to soak up the atmosphere, landscape and enjoy things. Besides, if I was a cowboy I wouldn’t run to somewhere. I’d slowly meander reflecting on the meaningless brutality of frontier violence and the start beauty of the desolate landscape. Probably not in those terms. And I’d be riding a horse. And probably dragging someone behind the horse by means of lasso. But that would be for poetic reasons and not solely for violence. Interestingly I’ve discovered the game won’t let you sleep with hookers, but will let you drag someone up and down the main street of a town until they bleed to death. Morality is Interesting.

On my newly instigated (and just invented) food-group based rating system I’m going to give it: Really Good BP Pie That You Crave All Night After Drinking With Good Mates.

In other news: We made another 48hours film. People seemed to like it. This is good. Including the good people at io9.com – who have linked it on their site. Woot. Dan Allan’s face there for the whole world to see.

Alternatively: check it out here:

No Paul X Willis this time I’m afraid. Next year. Bigger.Faster.More shine.

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We’re not in Kansas

February 27th, 2010

Friday nights have always been good nights. Often due to beer (for centuries the traditional means of welcoming and obliterating the weekend). Always for the fact it’s no longer the working week.

Today I was sitting on Ben’s floor watching him blow raspberries on the feet of his not-quite-but-very-very-nearly-crawling son. And I realised that things have changed. For those that have been desperately clicking refresh on his blog for the last… year Karen did finish giving birth. And now there is Karen and Ben progeny doing things like rocking out to music (if I can teach him nothing else I’ll teach him to throw out the horns when rocking out to the Wiggles). And pulling my hair. I figure it’s best he enjoy it while he can.

And there are other babies. Caygill baby. Young baby. Clark baby.

This isn’t Bentleys on a Friday anymore. No sir.

Well done to all the parents involved. Also good work to Dan, who appears to be engaged.

Also – we are applying to have funding for a feature film. Take that everyone who left Christchurch. Boom!

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I’m on a Mac

January 4th, 2010

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2009?

December 13th, 2009

What 2009?

It’s gone kind of quickly. Not too long ago I was staring at the stars on New Years Eve trying to figure out what was going to happen this year. Now I’ve got soup and rice (two separate pots, don’t worry) on the boil in my kitchen trying to figure out what has happened.

I have a house! It is in the traditional European style of having walls to keep the wind off and a roof to keep birds out. I have a fence by my back garden to keep cars off my vege patch although an occasional rogue bumper has made the leap from next door. I somehow fluked an excellent buy at the bottom of the market and can now, if I wished, pretend to be a financial genius. However the soup I’m currently cooking is Onion Soup. Made from real onions and not from a packet because a packet is what rich people make soup from. And it’s not really French Onion soup because it’s only reducing never retreating.

I have a love of making soup. That probably sums up the course of my year very well. But bear with me and try not to roll your eyes too much. When you’re making a soup you add things to a pot and boil it heaps for a few hours making sure nothing sticks to the bottom otherwise it’ll burn and that’s no fun. But after it’s all boiled it’s not what it used to be. Magic. Cut up a few potatoes and put that in and magically potatoes will no longer be there.

I find that tremendously exciting.

I went to Peru. It was awesome. There are some photos on the blog. You can appreciate the awesomeness. There are now photos on my wall. They make me smile. In a kinda surreal way. I mean, I know I was there. But it was Peru! And Me! Together at last. Feels like I’m kind of remembering someone elses memories. But they’re good memories. And were with little bro on a big adventure so that was wicked. He’s now in London. In the (lucrative) sex industry. As a consultant. An IT consultant.

I’m not going to get sick of that one.

From a professional point of view however, this little baby is easily the highlight of the year:

Second in the country. The best live-action short of the comp. Awesome. I was doing the Inca Trail so found out days later from a wonderful voice message and celebrated with a bunch of amazing people in a restaurant by the railway tracks in a little Peruvian village.

We will use our winnings wisely and in-industry. And hopefully one day if things go right and we strike the right alternate universe dreams may occur.

This sort of has been the year of the decline of the blog in many respects. But also the year of the baby. Hopefully anyone who reads Ben’s blog, for instance, will realise Karen is no longer in labour and Theo is now a 9 month old barrel of laughs (I swear he said ‘Dave’ the other day). He also has a special trick of grabbing my beard, pulling me close and saying ‘Dadadadadadadada’ in his deep ’scary-child’ voice which is three octaves lower than mine.

Our film team for next years 48 Hours, for instance, should have at least 3 babies at their immediate disposal. Mothers permitting. And I don’t mean ‘disposal’ as in disposal.

I should write more.

Anyway, I’m sure there’ll be a slightly drunk on Christmas/alcohol post in the next few weeks. Other than that… I’m glad I’m not Tiger.

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Machu Picchu!

July 31st, 2009

Machu Picchu

More pictures at my Flickr page.

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Photos of Saqsaywoman

July 18th, 2009

It’s pronounced Sexy Woman. Now you know.

Giant Christ

Dog meets his match

Saqsaywoman stones

Teeth of the Puma

Saqsaywoman in winter afternoon

Saqsaywoman

Little brother

Saqsaywoman

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David Attenborough on Dave

June 9th, 2009

How is it possible a young and reasonably frightened young man could plan a trip to Peru in the same week he purchased a house and his team of aspiring film-makers go national in their quest to win a swag of booty?

The answer is as obvious as the look of permanent startlement that plasters his face whenever he tries to communicate using Spanish: it’s not. But for the first time in recorded memory he has moved into the good parallel dimension. His frantic cries of eeek and eeep echo around the valley are a musical accompaniment to this most fragile of dances.

Hmmmm.

Anyway. Tomorrow I fly to Auckland and then the next day: Peru. Could be a song in that: First we take Auckland, then we take the Incan capital of Cusco. Maybe not.

But the important thing is: I will blog every now and then. To keep you, valued reader of an audience of 3, happy.

Also: If you’re in NZ – watch C4 11pm June 17 for TBALC – New Fish. We’re in the nationals. Woot! And the final that Saturday at 9pm.

House confirmation has been passed and confirmed and everything like that. I have a house! I’ll have a home! This is beyond exciting. I haven’t had a home in years.

I’m astonished (and rather happy) at how wonderfully awesome life is right now.

Right. Off to record first entry in travel diary:
June 9. Christchurch
9.16PM
Eeeeek.

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48 Hours

June 5th, 2009

PETER JACKSON AND GUILLERMO DEL TORO COLLABORATE ON KIWI FILMS

Press Release
June 4th, 2009

Peter Jackson and Guillermo Del Toro spent valuable time away from The Hobbit to collaborate in selecting three wildcard films for the seventh annual ’V’ Energy 48HOURS Furious Filmmakingcompetition that had 700 filmmaking teams competing for a $100,000 prize pool. From the 700 shorts that screened nationwide, the six City Winners now go on to compete against Jackson’s and Del Toro’s three Wildcard picks on C4 Television.

In an exciting new development (thanks NZONAIR & C4), thirty of the best shorts will screen every week night on C4, starting Monday June 8th and culminating in the Grand Final on June 20th at 9pm.

The first wildcard selected by the duo is by The Downlow Concept with their short IT’S LIKE BEING BACK IN PRIMARY SCHOOL, a tale of floods, feces and mature love. This years Auckland Runner Ups will be hoping history repeats as they look to win their second Grand Championship after previously winning in 2006 for their film BROWN PERIL; THE TIM PORCH STORY.

The second wildcard is Team IdiotVision’s short THE REVENGER. Long time fan favourites, this team returns to form with a hilarious take on home consumer revenge kits.

The final wildcard team Goodfellas were also one of last years Grand Finalists. This year they are back with the nail-biting horror pic FANATICS about a Crusaders supporter from hell.

A judging panel will then decide just who will be crowned Grand Champion for 2009. This years judges include home town heroes Taika Waititi, Cliff Curtis, Karl Urban and twenty international Judges.

Joining the three wildcards are the six city winners listed below.

Natures Baby by Sinistral (Auckland)
A mothers love results in a giant naked dwarf attacking Auckland

Hardwood Floors by Guerilla Monkeys (Hamilton)
A psychedelic tale of parallel worlds and affordable housing

The Amazing World of Sticks by Kaiti Hill (Gisborne, Tairawhiti)
An educational look at crucifixtion

Otack Otack Otack Falls by Killa Walz/Orca (Wellington)
An existential fusion of Shock Corridor and Titticut Follies 

New Fish by TBALC (Christchurch)
Inspired and funny musical spin on prison flicks like Short Eyes

Charlotte by Line Men (Dunedin)
Stunning animation about nosy neighbours and secret parcels

TV Series Every Week Night @ 11pm on C4 – June 8 – June 18
Grand Final June 20th, 9pm C4

48HOURS OFFICIAL WEBSITE 
Hundreds of teams compete. Hundreds of thousands watch.

WRITE. SHOOT. CUT. SURVIVE.

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New Fish

May 29th, 2009

Well. How about that. Fourth time lucky.

 

TBALC win Christchurch regional final of 48 Hours.

 

We didn’t even have to rig the voting.

 

Film now gets shown on the final. Which is on C4.

 

That’s crazy. And awesome.

 

Unfortunately I will be in Peru for the final. That’s not really much of a bad thing though. I’ll be in Peru!

 

Things are remarkably awesome.

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Unexpected house

May 24th, 2009

Turns out I’m getting older. As evidenced by the following:

I have purchased a house. 2 bedroom. Big living areas. Close to the city and Jade Stadium.

Woot.

AND the big trees on the neighbouring property which were causing me to have a few doubts are being cut down in a few weeks. Sunshine. Awesome.

 

It other, equally exciting news – I tracked down a copy of Tin Planet by Space. It is now playing on volume: Loud.

 

Extract:

I know you say I’m a crazy mixed-up lunatic.
But that’s okay ‘cos I love you in a crazy way.
The chances are I’m not the boy you fantasized about
But give me a chance, You never know I might brainwash you.
Chances are you’re seeing some other freak tonight
And hope that maybe this time he’s Mister Right.
But if he turns out wrong you know that I’ll be there.
I may be second best, but life is never fair.

Posted in Sail to the moon | 7 Comments »

…

April 26th, 2009

Crikey.

 

I’ve put an offer in on a house. Actually I put an offer in on a house yesterday. That came to nothing but didn’t really expect it to and I’m not horribly worried about that. Went to an open home today and it was a nice wee place. So I’ve put another offer in. The vendor has already come back with a counter offer. I am considering this as we speak.

 

(part of the consideration is playing ‘I’m on a boat’ over and over again)

 

And so the fatal dance toward responsibility, fiscal control and grown-uppeness has begun.

 

Eep.

Posted in Sail to the moon | 7 Comments »

Greeting

March 31st, 2009

It’s disturbing how fast time is moving. It’s April tomorrow. Eek. I keep expecting October. Soon I’ll be hitching my pants to my chin and talking about those days when i used to pick garlic before we had the internets.

Which did happen. Once. For a day. It’s hard work picking garlic. Makes you clothes smell too.

Not much of interest and excitement is happening. Counting down to Peru which is interesting and exciting but I suspect it will be a lot more so when I’m over there and engaged in widespread Alpaca hijacking.

Grand Theft Llama would be an awesome game.

Did manage to successfully take Theo and Ben for a trip to the supermarket on Sunday. Ben and I have been to the supermarket together successfully on numerous occasions. But this was the first time we’d taken his progeny. I was keen to try out the ‘I have a baby, baby’ line and I think Ben was keen to try out the ‘oh man Karen needs some rest’.

Turns out movies haven’t completely lead me astray. Several attractive women did come over to us and look at Theo. But also many, many old witches from out cave territory came over to see whether he’d fit in their cauldron. Turns out: no.

Anyway. Here is a photo. Ben is looking more alert. And Theo less so. It’s from when Theo was 24 hours old or something. He has grown since then. Ben – well he’s probably the same size. Just a good deal sleepyier.

New Son

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I’m on a boat

March 17th, 2009

Actually that’s a lie.

 

But these guys are on a boat.

 

They see quite excited about it.

 

Oh how I laughed.

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Eep.

February 4th, 2009

Airfares: Purchased.

Trek to Maccu PichuL Booked.

Apprehension: Check.

Frustration at downstairs neighbour’s extremely loud x-box: High.

Stress: everyone needs a hobby.

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Trouble a’brewin

January 17th, 2009

The old Woman's Hospital (partially demolished)

 

Best send Lassie.

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Addict.

January 3rd, 2009

I’ve found a new addiction.

 

It’s worse than crack.

 

A few years ago I used to have a stat counter on my blog. This was bad as I’d keep refreshing it and getting all excited when people would visit.

 

Then I got an application that would let me find out where the people visiting were from.

 

I was HUGE in Siberia. 

 

I don’t know why. Sometimes it’s best not to know.

 

Anyway, after hours of constant clicks and reloads I moved to this site where my incompetence in programming is more than obvious. I don’t know how to add the click counters. But that’s a good thing, I think.

 

The thing is, I’ve moved onto something stronger.

 

Flickr.

 

It’s like crack cut with crystal meth, nicotine and methylated spirits. (I don’t actually know what any of that would be like but it certainly sounds addictive).

 

I’ve just spent the last 3 hours trying to get more people to tell me my photos are amazing and awesome.

 

I just need one more heart and then I get an award. Well, I cyber award. It’s not something I can put on a mantlepiece or throw at washed up celebrities. But… yeah well it’s important.

 
Night swimming
 

Or I need more National Geographic Awards. So that I can pretend I’m with the National Geographic. (Note – in no way affiliated with the National Geographic).

 Cass Bay

 

Because my worth is inherent within these photos.

 

Sigh….

 

Happy New Year.

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Season in review

December 21st, 2008

Sometimes I’m reasonable certain that life should have a ‘best of’ episode. Hopefully it does at some point – but that will be dependent on me a) staying friendly and b) dying. But that won’t be for a fantastically long time. So I suppose I’m after a mid-season review.

 

I was somewhat surprised to find that 2008 has almost finished. I’m still trying to say goodbye to 2007.

 

If we stick with the somewhat cumbersome concept of evaluating it like a DVD I think it’s fair to say that it’s been a critical success. There was a pivotal moment early on where I nearly left and started a spin-off season in London. But given how the current global economy has… been and gone I tend to think that I came 12 hours away from being laid off 6 months later.

 

The usual theatrics came and went. 48 hours was a lot of fun. othello was incredible to be a part of. And, I think, both are justifiably awesome projects have been involved in.

 

Flatted in a place named after a Scottish rugby hero. not many people have done that before. It was good. And highly amusing most of the time (between Todd, Andrew and myself there’s usually been a joke for every occasion – and usually physical joke). We invented box fighting and box jumping as important flatwarming sports. One of the first people to try it out has subsequently attached himself to a pair of rockets and flown. True story. And kinda weird.

 

Things happened. People got married. Had babies. Changed jobs, flats etc. I largely stayed put and had a good time. ISeeing someone who is awesome and supportive so that’s to be encouraged. Got into Photography.

 

Decided the reason the year has gone so fast is that I’ve had so much fun.

 

2009 will be amazing. If for no other reasons than Ben and Karen will have a baby, and I will conquer Peru. But also for more reasons. Many, many more reasons.

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Ridiculous Evenings

November 14th, 2008

Tomorrow is day off. Hurray. It’s wonderful when Thursday is actually a Friday and Friday becomes a Saturday. And Saturday becomes some kind of siamese-Saturday.

Ben and Andrew are playing Army of Two. I’ve given up – it’s a patently ridiculous and thoroughly unsatisfying game. Karen is watching, slightly shaking her head I think at the fact the father of her soon to be Baby McAwesome Allan is yelling things like ‘Get more aggro!’ ‘No, not in the face!’ and ‘Oh god, why!’

They’ve given up. Now it’s time for co-op Rainbow 6 Vegas 2. Which sounds more like some kind of football score. Not that Rainbow is a town. It’s either a hippy commune or possibly some form of drug induced hallucination. That’d be a pretty awesome football game, if you think about it.

I’m not surewhat people did before computer games. Talked possibly. Interacted. Discussed things that didn’t involve lines like ‘you got the guy on the right, or the left?’. People probably didn’t say ‘I’m going to be Dennis Glover… or a girl’ very often. Which was actually a line I heard a couple of minutes ago.

I’m pretty sure it killed stamp collecting and spyrographs as hobbies.

The whole concept of updating the blog has gone out the window lately. So… recent news includes realising that the top of my head had a differnt skin-hair ratio than the sides of my head. Traditionally it’s called ‘balding’. I prefer to think of it as ‘testosteroning’. Irrespective I’ve gone for the shave. More corporate chic than skinhead fascist I hope. Although amusing comments have included:

‘Ah, Uncle Fester’ (Damn you, Allan)

”Buddah!’

And my personal favourite:

‘Hello, I’m trying to track down a villain from a James Bond movie… oh there you are!’

But I’m not growing a mo for movember this year. Instead I’m supporting the big man in Melbourne as he struggles without chin hair. Props.

Right… sorry – I have to go shoot some terrorists. The future of your… tomorrow may depend on it. Rainbow: 6. Vegas: 2. Dave: ?

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12 weeks

October 26th, 2008

According to maths, I have now been smoke free for 12 weeks.

That’s 84 days.

And probably around 1k cigarettes haven’t been smoked.

Haven’t even had a puff on the sly.

Celebration demands classic 90s song:

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